Sunday, July 22, 2007

Jesus Wept!


Originally Posted: Thursday, January 18, 2007

Bless : tr.v. blessed or blest, bless-ing, bless-es
1. To make holy by religious rite; sanctify.
2. To make the sign of the cross over so as to sanctify.
3. To invoke a divine favor upon.
4. To honor as holy; glorify

"It's a blessing!"

Is there any more annoying phrase in the English language? Any idiom more likely to send a sane person screaming dementedly from the room? Any more pompous, inane or, in fact, egocentric expression ever spawned? I think not.

Let us be clear, I am not an atheist. I believe in G-d. In fact, I believe that there is no G-d but G-d and His ways are wondrous and mythic. This does not, however, mean that I believe that every single thing that goes my way is a miracle. Just as I don't believe that everything that goes wrong is His fault. If I stub my toe it's not G-ds fault. I'm just a klutz.

On the flip side, I know a man who believes that every little thing that happens to him is a "blessing". Every. Little. Thing. How do I know this? Because he says it all day long. Repeatedly. It drives me around the fucking twist.

Examples:
"I hate Pepsi. They have Coke products? That's a blessing!"
"I found a parking space, what a blessing."
"I was able to find a sandwich place I enjoy. It's a blessing."

I've come to the conclusion that either he doesn't know what the word means or he believes that G-d is there just to act as his personal assistant. Is that a particularly pious attitude? Well, who knows? A lot of people share it so maybe it is. After all, twenty million Frenchmen can't be wrong. . . . Oh. Wait. Sure they can.

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